Dysphoria

I'm so disheartened this past few days, I want to cry and give up. Stupid heart,please stop beating even once. Or should I blame my pituitary gland for excreting endorphins that keeps me falling too much in love.

 

If she's not happy with me anymore, I can't blame her, It's all my fault. I do love her so much up to the point I tried to keep track of my weight, get a good haircut and  try to look neat, try to put on a good/decent dress, just for her... its just that I can't keep up with people's expectations.

And now I'm starting to understand bit by bit that there will always be this person who had her a long time ago. Who made her heart beat once. Who will always had her even when she's already mine.

And Will I be able to bear more pain. If someday I need to set her free?

 

Why do I need to fall this much and bear all this pain. Why do  I need to catch a  bright star if I could content myself just seeing it every night. Maybe that bright star above fills my heart with simple joys and contentment... and when everything falls down, maybe looking up and wishing I was there is just a glimpse of hope.

Closer

I can't take my eyes off  you.

I can't take my mind off  you.

Did I say that I miss you?

Did I say that I want to leave it all behind just to be with you?

Days, months,years and counting

Hold onto love that is what I'm doing now that I've found you. 

And in the night, I could be helpless, I could be lonely, sleeping without you.

And I wouldn't feel so used. But you always really knew, I just wanna be with you.I just wanna badly be with you. For no one else can have the part of me I gave to you.

Before I say another word let me tell you I love you. Let me hold you close and hug you tight and whisper these words as sweet as I can.

Anton :) (http://antonnoblesseoblige.blogspot.com)